I Can't Breathe
by Felinu
Summary: A little "poem thingy" written about the Shenko pairing in ME1


As I look ahead, I see nothing but stars, then, slowly, I see one of the ship's life pods come into view.  
Is it the one you're on? Did you make it? Are you safe?  
Am I dying?  
I can't breathe.

I look over and see you,  
you're being pulled towards the beacon.  
I won't lose anyone else here.  
I pull you free, and am trapped myself.  
The visions, the pain.  
I can't breathe.

We're in the medbay.  
You feel guilty, but it isn't your fault.  
I don't blame you.  
You smile at me, and for a moment, the world stops.  
I can't breathe.

I'm looking out at the Citadel.  
It's beautiful, it goes on forever.  
Did you just say I'm beautiful?  
We're on duty. We couldn't... but still...  
I can't breathe.

On the Normandy once again,  
talking to you about the present and the past.  
"Do you get to know all your officers this personally, ma'am?"  
No, no I don't.  
Did I just say that?  
We're officers, we can't...  
What am I doing?  
I can't breathe.

We've found Liara, and are heading to Feros.  
I shouldn't... Yet here I am at your station, with you again.  
"When someone is special to you..."  
Special? Am I special to you, then?  
"Tell me if I'm out of line, Shepard."  
Definately not, but...  
We can't... can we?  
I can't breathe.

Standing in the research center on Novaria.  
"We can't just kill her, it would be genocide."  
You're right, of course.  
Part of my mind says this will bite us later, but...  
I let her go. You smile that smile of yours at me and...  
I can't breathe.

Back on the Normandy once more,  
at your station again. Should I be here?  
Something's wrong, what is it?  
"There's a rumor going around about you and Dr. T'soni."  
Me and Liara? No.  
She's not the one I keep being drawn back to.  
She's not you...  
I can't breathe.

On Feros, with the surviving researchers.  
"We have to try to save the colonists, Commander."  
We do? Of course we do, it won't be easy though.  
Sometimes I think, having you with me makes me a better person.  
Sometimes I think... you are so... no, we can't... I...  
I can't breathe.

Aboard the Normandy again,  
I definitely spend too much time at your station, someone will notice, eventually.  
Confessions...  
"I killed him, Shepard"  
You were trying to help her, but she abandoned you.  
"She was afraid of me"  
That's why you're so controlled.  
I'm not afraid of you. I think I'm... no... we can't.  
We shouldn't, not... not now.  
I can't breathe.

I'm standing on Virmire,  
I might as well be alone.  
What do I do?  
Either I lose you, or I lose my closest friend.  
I can't... I could never leave you behind.  
She says she understands... does she? Can she?  
I can't breathe.

Once again, back... home.  
"I've never known a woman like you, Shepard"  
You haven't had the easiest life, but I like the man it's made of you  
And I do. And shoreleave has never sounded so good.  
We've definitely earned some time... alone... together.  
I can't breathe.

We're locked down at the Citadel.  
I'm so frustrated, I haven't even gone to see you.  
You come to me instead.  
Talk to me, comfort me.  
We'll figure it out, we have to.  
"That's one of the things I l... admire, about you, Shepard"  
Galaxy hangs in the balance, and you trip while talking to me  
Still, I wish you'd have said what you started to.  
You help me up, a misjudgment, I'm in your arms.  
Your lips are so close, I... we shouldn't, but... I want to...  
Your scent is everywhere... I...  
"Commander"  
We jump apart, caught, surprised.  
I can't breathe.

On the way to Ilos.  
The end of our journey is near.  
You come to me once more.  
"It's been a pleasure serving under you, Commander"  
I don't think I've had the pleasure of you serving under me  
Did I just say that out loud?  
You laugh it off, but... I love you... I need you...  
Bunk here tonight, with me  
"Battlefield flirting is one thing, Shepard. There are rules against fraternization"  
I know... but I've stopped caring... I need you.  
We kiss, you hold me.  
The world can end, the galaxy can end, there is only us.  
I can't breathe.

We're onboard the Normandy,  
it's been a month since we won the battle.  
We've been attacked, there's fire everywhere.  
"Joker won't leave the cockpit, I'm not leaving either"  
The hell you aren't. I won't... I can't watch you die.  
Kaidan. Go. Now.  
You hesitate, but... I'm still your Commander.  
"Aye, aye."  
You go. At least you will be safe. I hope.  
I can't breathe.

As I look ahead, I see nothing but stars, then, slowly, I see one of the ship's life pods come into view.  
Is it the one you're on? Did you make it? Are you safe?  
I am dying...  
I can't breathe.


End file.
